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Rule Breaker

Posted on Oct 11, 2023 in On the Porch with Patti

By Patti Parish-Kaminski, Publisher

Finding the answer to the proverbial question: Where’s the bar?

Seems like as each year goes by, more rules pop up.  It’s downright perplexing to me that in our society based on freedom of speech, freedom to bear arms, freedom to vote that more and more rules rear their ugly heads.  Now I’m not saying that all rules are bad – clearly some are necessary – but a few truly need at the minimum a cursory review.

I am too often presented with ridiculous regulations on the daily, and my response is typically succinct with a smile:  No.  It’s amazing how that little, one syllable word takes folks back oftentimes to the point that they do not know how to respond.  Perhaps it’s the delivery or the blatant opposition to a norm, but I have found it extremely effectively for risible requests.

So, on this eve of my fifty-something birthday, I have decided that I am going to play out the next 30 plus years of my life with my own rules.  Certainly, I will continue the mono-syllabic mantra that has worked so effectively thus far, but here are my rules for livin’, porch sittin’ and otherwise going forward.

  1. Champagne drinking does not adhere to cocktail hour norms; it is consumable and quite acceptable at any time day or night.
  2. Feathers, sequins and diamonds always complement an ensemble.
  3. If you don’t want to do it, don’t.
  4. Tennis shoes are the new high heels.
  5. Blazers are a vehicle; not a wardrobe staple.
  6. The highs and lows of the hairdo always apply: Higher to God and down to your waist.
  7. Peer pressure is a non-existent concept.
  8. Spend your time as you would spend your money – wisely.
  9. “Me Time” is a thing – don’t question it.
  10. Don’t save the good stuff: Use the china and crystal on the daily, and wear your best jewelry with your pajamas.
  11. If there’s not adequate ROI on a person or situation, stop it.

This is how I see life going forward, but y’all know I do tend to be a rule breaker, so we will see how this plays out.  See y’all next week – on the porch!

Patti Parish-Kaminski

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