The Birthday Quarter | Fort Bend Focus Magazine

By Patti Parish-Kaminski, Publisher

Patti Ann Parish 30 minutes old and pre-hair.

In just a few short days, I’ll reach a milestone – my 60^th birthday. I can’t even fathom that I’m going to have a “six” in front of my age. How did that happen? I mean, I had a “two” in front of my age when I married Mr. Kaminski just last year. This passage of time is a slippery slope.

When it comes to birthdays, I’ve been a lifelong proponent of the “Birthday Month” concept. I mean, after all, why would you celebrate another trip around the sun that takes an entire year for simply one day? It just doesn’t seem equitable. It’s at minimum a month-long celebration. It makes perfect sense to me, and I’m here for it.

As least I was until my girlfriend Janica gave me a new perspective. She does not celebrate her big day as a “Birthday Month.” No, not my girl. She subscribes to the theory of “Birthday Quarter.” Did I mention she’s brilliant?

“Wait, what?” I exclaimed when she outlined the concept.

You see, Janica’s birthday is also in October, so we are both fourth quarter celebrants, fourth quarter consisting of three months, October, November and December, of course. Her three-month commemorative plan is frankly genius, and it makes sense. I mean, it takes us nine months of growth in the womb before we make our grand debut on the big day. Then, we are forced to wait an entire year to get to the annual birthday bash. Three hundred and sixty-four days! Mathematically speaking, it just seems appropriate to extend the revelry for a measly three months when it takes so much time to get us here and to conquer the next entire year – right? I can argue this concept all day long.

So, October 1 began my “Birthday Quarter,” and with me being only five years away from senior citizenship, I am milking this baby for all its worth – while I still can and am able. I am planning three months of revelry, raucousness and rejoicing.

Of course, planning – and partying – of this magnitude is going to require special preparations. I’ll be stocking up on Liquid IV, Pedialyte and ibuprofen. Acetaminophen is also a no-no for hangovers – among other things apparently. See y’all next week – on the porch!

Patti Parish-Kaminski