Texas and Snow

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By Patti Parish-Kaminski, Publisher

Now there are a lot of things in this world that just don’t mix.  Oil and water, alcohol and bleach, baking soda and vinegar – unless you are making a volcano for your baby’s science project – the list goes on and on.  But in South Texas there’s one thing for certain that are not bosom buddies and never will be: snow.

Now I don’t know if it’s the Lone Star State that doesn’t have a certain affinity for snow or its inhabitants.  I believe it can be argued that neither appreciates a wintery mix.  Our infrastructure is not prepared nor are our people.  We don’t have the layered, thick winter wardrobe. We wear shorts at Thanksgiving and sometimes Christmas.  This snow thing is just not a good fit.

I do appreciate the excitement and pure joy, albeit brief, of children getting outside and being able to build snowmen, sled, have snowball fights and such.  Heck, I appreciate anything that gets kids outside and off their devices, so provisional props for a good snow day – for the babies

We South Texans just lose our ever-lovin’ mind when it comes to a blustery blizzard.  Life halts – midway – and doesn’t commence until well after the winter wonderland ceases.  We don’t know how to drive in it, we don’t own snow chains or snow shovels, and we don’t have the power grid to support the chill.  It’s just not our thing.

So, what do we do when a good snow day comes barreling down our way?  We hunker down.  Yes, hunker is a verb.  We buy out the grocery stores – don’t even think about trying to buy chili ingredients or any accoutrements for Mexican food.  The shelves are bare.  We purchase copious amounts of alcohol for our icicle entourage, because we can likely find our way to a friend’s house or invite some over for a couple of days to weather the weather.  We cook huge, warm meals and have leftovers for days.  We gas up our cars, even though we’re warned on the hourly not to drive them.  And finally, we watch crazy television reporters bundled up out in the elements 24/7.  Yeah, we’re not supposed to get on the road, but they are all out and about?  And they look miserable.  Go figure.

As a Southern woman, I refuse to allow a little snowy sprinkle to interfere with my porch time.  That’s just not okay.  We have fans on our porch to combat the heat, so when there’s a chill in the air, why not move a heater out to the porch?  Makes perfect sense to me.  That way we can enjoy the winter wonderland in comfort.  See y’all next week – on the porch!

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Patti Parish-Kaminski

Follow Patti Parish-Kaminski on Facebook at www.facebook.com/OnThePorchWithPatti/ and on Instagram at instagram.com/ontheporchwithpatti/.

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