By Patti Parish-Kaminski, Publisher
I’m different. I’ve always known that. Mother always said I was “special,” but I know that’s code for odd. I like things that most people don’t. I certainly wear things that most people won’t. I read things that most people would absolutely refuse. And idleness, the basic R ‘n R that lots of folks enjoy, vexes me after about 24 hours.
I have friends who appreciate days of the R ‘n R situation. They can sit for hours on a phone or device, watching tv or doing nothing. I’m just not that girl. If I’m not busy, I’m asleep. There’s not much in between with me – unless The University of Texas is playing. And yes, I am particularly vexed about the Sugar Bowl. Please don’t mention it in my company. The bitter taste of defeat is going down like vinegar.
Odd thing is when we have a couple of days when we slow down, my modus operandi is pretty basic.
First, I catch up on sleep. I don’t rest; I don’t relax. I sleep. And I’m Rip Van Winkle when I go down – with or without imbibing on curious cocktails. But when I’m done, I’m done. That typically lasts about a day – 24 hours max. Then I jump on chores, things that need to be done, but that typically doesn’t last more than a day either.
Thing is when I’m not meeting deadlines working on the daily, my little brain works overtime, and I tend to think I can do just about anything now that I have ample time on my hands. Lack of positivity has never been an issue for me. Case and point: Mr. Kaminski, Bub, Emerson and I went to see Willy Wonka. It’s a musical. Strike one for me. I was just going along to get along, and Mr. Kaminski had wisely procured wine and popcorn, so I knew I could make it. Halfway through the musical mayhem, I determined that it must not be very difficult to write a musical, to pen the lyrics. Let someone else deal with the music a la Elton – and let me be Bernie. Now I’m not talking Andrew Lloyd Weber type musicals, but I could definitely do the Dr. Seuss-like music I was experiencing. It was all about alliteration. I’m all about alliteration in atypical and anonymous actions. Kolt agreed; we could do this.
By 10 am the next morning, I had jotted down some notes regarding my foray into lyrical literacy. Mr. Kaminski promptly took my computer away from me and reminded me this was our “down time.”
“Down time” consisted of the following: There was snow watching; that was a solid ten minutes. There was day drinking; I could get behind that. Then there were the never-evening Christmas movies. Shortly into that “down time” activity, I decided I could write a Christmas movie. The plots are all similar; the scenarios are all familiar. The props and actors are all recycled. There’s always a Christmas miracle and an extremely cranky individual who needs Jesus – hence the aforementioned Christmas miracle. Yep, I could do this.
Once again, I fired up my computer only to have it brutally snatched away, again.
I suppose idle time for my brain isn’t good. I’ve been playing the T-Rex Dino Shooting Game, and I’ve got that down. Now I want to get my CHL and go the range regularly because I’m totally convinced, I can be a master sharpshooter. Probably not the best news for Mr. Kaminski – me locked and loaded.
I’m only two days into this rest and relaxation gig. Y’all pray for Mr. Kaminski. No telling what else I’ll decide I can do – or at least try – new year and all. Happy New Year! See y’all next week – on the porch!
Patti Parish-Kaminski
Follow Patti Parish-Kaminski on Facebook at www.facebook.com/OnThePorchWithPatti/ and on Instagram at instagram.com/ontheporchwithpatti/.