Posted on Oct 31, 2014 in
FEATURES
By Kerstin Brown –
As the old holiday favorite goes, ‘tis the season to be jolly, but that’s not the case for everyone.
When Charles Schultz’s classic A Charlie Brown Christmas comes on television every year, millions of us sit down in front of the television to watch it for the umpteenth time. Charlie Brown’s revelation about his feelings for the holidays are looked at by some viewers as Charlie Brown being, well, himself.
Charles Schultz. © 1965 United Feature Syndicate Inc. (ABC Television Network).
But for some, it appears Charlie Brown feels as they do around the holiday season:
Charlie Brown felt so depressed. “I just don’t understand Christmas. Instead of feeling happy, I feel sort of let down.” – A Charlie Brown Christmas, 1965
We all know that the holidays are supposed to be a joyful time of relaxed gatherings of family and friends. But, that’s not always the case. Reality is we are totally stressed out, exhausted, sleep deprived and in seemingly endless clashes over parking spots or who was next in the checkout line.
During this time of year, there is a high potential for psychological, physical and financial stress. As a result, the holidays can leave millions of people feeling blue, not happy or merry. The holiday blues can affect men and women of all ages with intense and unsettling feelings ranging from mild sadness to severe clinical depression.
So, why are so many of us feeling like Charlie Brown, and what can we do to prevent it? With some suggestions from his “psychiatrist” Lucy, Charlie Brown found ways of coping with his blues, like getting involved by directing the Christmas play and giving a sad, tiny tree some tender loving care and a home.
Here are some tips to help cope with the holiday blues and avoid having a Charlie Brown holiday season:
Holiday Blues Coping Tips
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1. Get Real:Instead of trying to emulate the perfect holiday straight from the pages of Southern Living, reframe expectations so that they are more realistic of what can actually be accomplished with the time, money and energy that fits your individual life. Determine priorities, establish realistic goals and don’t assume everything will be perfect – food, decorations, parties, family or presents. Make the holidays meaningful and survivable by keeping holiday expectations in check.
2. Watch the Booze:It is easy for us to think that a little “liquid courage” can go a long way when facing the holidays, but that’s a dangerous path to take. Truth serum in the form of spiked eggnog isn’t a good thing. Alcohol is a depressant, and overindulging in alcohol causes us to have less control over what is said, be more emotionally sensitive and can ruin others’ enjoyment of the occasion. Holiday gatherings are not the appropriate time to work out issues with Aunt Linda’s controlling nature or Dad’s criticism of the career we’ve chosen. It’s a time to be grateful for what we have and let go of the rest.
3. Ghosts of Holidays Past:Be prepared and learn from the past. Before the hustle and bustle of the holiday season arrives, sit down and think, what have the problems been? Identify where the stress comes from and how to avoid those pitfalls. Do an inventory of stress and anxiety triggers. If certain situations or people spark those triggers, make the conscious choice to stay away. The forced cheerfulness of the holiday season can fuel anxieties, so spend time in caring, supportive, nurturing environments. Limit the amount of time spent with people or in situations that are aggravating, insulting, negative or otherwise difficult to be around.
4. Just Say No:Be open to projects, invitations and get-togethers around the holidays, but recognize that it’s okay to say “no.” Taking on too many things at once can leave us feeling too run down to enjoy the holiday season. Don’t take on a project that seems more important to you and less appreciated by others. If family members want a 17 course Christmas dinner made completely from scratch but don’t offer to provide any assistance in the kitchen to get it done, understand that it is okay to express that it is too much for one person to handle. Decide what can be comfortably done and what cannot be done.
5. Relax and Be Thankful:Instead of focusing on all of the stresses and shortcomings of the holidays, think of the true reason for the season. This doesn’t have to be a taxing or traumatic experience. Remember, we are fortunate enough to be able to spend time with loved ones. Enjoy being surrounded by this love, even if said love drives us all a little bonkers one time or another. If there comes a point when it gets to be too much, take a step back and have some “down time” to relax, pray, meditate, laugh or whatever works when life stressors pop up any other day of the year. Most of all, develop a sense of gratitude and tune into the good things in life. Being thankful is the best medicine – without any adverse side effects.
Is it more than the holiday blues?
Clinical depression is more than just feeling sad for a few weeks. The symptoms generally include changes in appetite and sleep patterns, losing interest in daily activities, poor energy, no motivation, difficulty concentrating, a general feeling of hopelessness and for some, thoughts of suicide. Clinical depression impairs relationships, education, career and causes dysfunction in day-to-day life. Clinical depression requires professional treatment. If you are concerned that yourself, a family member or friend may be suffering from more than just the holiday blues, contact a mental health professional.
